Once I stepped unto the path I began to see the syncronicities; the classes, the books and the teachers all began to show up for me. If you have heard the saying, “When the student is ready the teacher will appear” well that is exactly what started to happen. It is also when my guide started pushing me down my path. I say pushing because that is what it felt like. This force outside of me presenting opportunities for me way before I thought I was ready. Years of pushing because the doubts and fears were always there. I needed the pushing, right to the edge.
It all started with Kundalini yoga, I went to a class at House of Intuition in Los Angeles. That is where I would meet my first teacher, Aimee Bello of Altared Space. Something that day woke inside of me, I knew it had always been there, just waiting for me. Within a month I was signed up to begin yoga teacher training. That was July of 2013 and it was just the beginning.
It wasn’t long before another teacher presented herself, Naha Armady of 22 Teachings. Naha would open a world for me that I barely knew existed. The tarot cards became my sacred and wise companions. She would also introduce me to crystals and the study of the hermetic qabalah. Through her teachings I have connected with my deep knowing within. She taught me that magic is real.
My teachers continued to show me the way and introduced me to the sacred teachings of reiki, theurgy, astrology and most importantly to know thyself.
In 2014, the pushing continued and I was off to my first Spirit Weavers Gathering. A gathering in Northern California (now Southern Oregon). Where 600 woman join together in community, to honor our ancestors by sharing skills, ceremony and wisdom in a supportive and safe space held in the arms of Mother Earth. Well I was terrified! I didn’t know anyone else at the gathering and had never even slept in or pitched a tent, besides practicing in my living room a week before the gathering. The first few hours I was actually shaking, no my life was not in danger but I was way out of my comfort zone. I did it! I pitched my tent, unloaded my car and I think I had even stopped shaking. Then….someone came up and told me I couldn’t camp in that space. I think she must of seen the look of defeat in my eyes as she offered to help me find a spot and move my stuff. From then on everything just seemed magical. I knew that no matter what I would be supported. The experience was beyond all expectations! As a woman there are very few places in the world where you feel safe, that you aren’t being judged, compared to or just free to be yourself. For those few days it was like being in another world where I was loved exactly as I am and valued for just being. I swore that I would be back the next year. I was and the year after that, I hope to never miss it.
My tent below from my first year at Spirit Weavers.
In 2016 I felt like an element that was missing from my studies, was finally going to be added to my wide array of cultivation, herbalism. It was through a friend that I found Green Wisdom Herbal Studies and my teacher, Julie James. It was here that my love of nature I had since childhood officially made the connection with my spiritual path. I graduated from the year long apprenticeship in December 2016. My appreciation and respect for nature, plants and their spirits would forever be altered in abundant gratitude.
All of this was going on while working a very full time corporate job in the music industry. It did all seem like too much at times. However, there was no way I couldn’t do it, my passion for it drove me onward and although the pushing seemed a bit less, it was still there.
When you want to manifest something it’s important to let the universe, spirit, divine or however you chose to refer to that source outside of yourself, know it. Let divine know by showing an energetic effort on your part. Say yes when doors are opened for you, be open to receive when opportunities are presented and surrender to just do it.
It sounds easy but when it’s happening the doubts and fears like to creep in…Who are you to do this? Are you sure you know enough? Look at these other people that have been doing this way longer than you, you are definitely not ready. Would I ever be ready? In 2017 I made the decision that ready or not, it was time. Did I know everything about everything, no. Did I have wisdom, knowledge, teachings to share? Yes. Could I hold space for others? Yes. So I surrendered to doing it.
Once I surrendered the doors began opening. I didn’t hesitate, I said YES. With every yes it seems more doors open, sometimes more than I have time to go through. In October I said yes to being a reader, healer and teacher at the House of Intuition in Los Angeles, I am over the moon thrilled for this experience. I am still working my corporate career but I feel the push to let it go and trust my path will be supported. I know the time is coming, when I will need to be the fool of the tarot and take the leap. However, my guide is allowing for me to take a respite and enjoy the journey right now. The pushing has relented slightly.
I am also humbled and honored that in 2018 I will be a teacher at Spirit Weavers Gathering during the Sun session. From a frightened girl trembling to pitch her tent, to 4 years later, a teacher in hope of empowering and inspiring others on their journey.
I write this in gratitude and reverence for my teachers and in hopes that those who read this will follow their passion and know that when you walk your path you will be guided.
To be continued…